No Back Bone

What if nursing school and being a nurse isn't for me? I've been thinking about it a lot. I need to figure it out sometime. but I can't. It's the only occupation that I can put myself in and i will be happy with it for the rest of my life. I keep thinking there must be something better, something that drives me more. I don't want to wake up everyday hating my job. I want to enjoy it and be happy. Of course. I really enjoy working with special needs kids. If there is a classroom with one kid that has something special I'll work with that kid the whole day, and I love it. So why am I not going to school to work with special needs? I would love to be an at home tutor with kids that struggle with autism or asburgers. So why am I going to nursing school? I don't really know why. It makes me sad now that I sit down and write this down. I feel it's that I'll upset people if they know I'm going to be a teacher, there is people out there that want more for me than that, teachers don't make any money. I've said that before too. Am I only going to school for the money. I'll be making good money in 2 years, that's awesome. But what if there is the other job that will make me more happy. Who am I kidding. I'm going to nursing school. I am so easily influenced I will never choose anything that makes me the happiest. I'll choose everything that makes everyone else the happiest.